Short Stories

February 2004, this was an exciting month. Planned a big ski trip, a whole week long one to be exact. At first I started planning a 3 day trip to Red and White through Giddy Goat Adventures. After everyone I had more or less booked cancel on moi, I decided to take the whole week off and rip with my bro Kelly. Insert sleep deprivation here. Sleep dep started out slowly Sunday night after I drove the mighty Tacoma out to Lethbridge visiting with Nadine and Adam. I worked all day at the ski hill, came home, packed and loaded up the truck. Thanks again guys for having us over, it was pretty good catching up. Skied Castle Mtn on Monday. www.castlemountainresort.com
This is one of the few areas I recommend to anyone that really wants good bang for their buck. An old t-bar and three old chairs; two of which have been bought from us at Sunshine. The lift towers have placards for Billy’s tire Service and Bob’s Bobcat Company. It’s an area where you go back to the basics. Skiing there that day was not as it has usually been; insanely deep and windy. Windy as f*ck. There wasn’t any fresh snow but we did happen to find some good pow-wow pockets hidden around the mountain. It being my first day on my new 189 Seth Pistols, things were interesting I guess. 128mm tip on the hardpack ain't soo much fun. Thanks again to my local bros showing us where the best places would be. We had the extra-long “paceourselves out for the rest of the week and drink a bottle of Jack Daniels” tailgate lunch. Ya that and LaBomba! If anyone of you sees the sauce in the Italian section of the grocer called “LaBomba”, pick it up. (you’ve gotta use the Casino Italian accent to make it sound like I saying it right now). Marra’s here in Canmore has it, it’s $10 bucks and it’s defiantly the LaBomba. So ya this sauce, you spread it onto the bread or crakers or whatever and enjoy. We combined it with sandwich and meat and cheese and red peppers and so on. Only we’re spreading it on kid’s arm sized bread. So f*cking hot most people start pullin’ tears. I think I saw Kelly let one go, but just one.

Anyways, after the booze and about 6 more ‘high speed don’t f*ck around’ laps with the local boys, we pushed off from Castle and drove straight to Nelson stopping for slurpees in Creston. Kelly asked me to drive about a 1/2 hour from the ski area. Ok says I but only if I can listen to Metallica. Slurpees are the ultimate picker-upper. I always had one during lectures and classes in school. The teacher would be talking about structural integrity, design properties and applications of grade 10.9 bolts, people would be sawing off logs, drooling onto their desks and I would be all ears. ‘ya ya bolts ya, give me more’. I’m pathetic sometimes but you can’t get 90’s when you’re sleeping. Drove through the Salmo-Creston pass, I sucked on the slurpee, Kelly sucked on his thumb. Snow pounded down the whole way through the pass. Anticipation, speed and Ride the litening kept me going into the night. Got to Nelson in time to check into the Best Western and go for a few whiskeys at Mike’s place downtown. Mark still bartends there and was ever so glad to see us. He still remembered my drink from the old college days, didn't even have to ask. Things felt pretty right for day one.

Part 2 to come later...

-TP

Ok, so it was a great day up in the VM. This day was awsome and i mean wicked sick. No clounds and about 15 degrees. I was out with a few guys. One on a REV 800, one on a ZRT 800 and one on a XCSP 700. I was riding a 97 Yamaha 700 Sx. We were going through the trail at about 85 to 95 MPH. I think at one point we hit 105 MPH. these trail were awsome just like most Vermont trails are. They were 5 sleds wide and fairly stright all through farm land. So we are going along at the excesive speed but it really didnt seem that fast on these trails. The guy on polaris passed me and the guy on the rev. So im in the back of the pack with the rev then polaris then arcticat in front of me. Me and the rev didnt like gettting passed so we both passed the polaris and went for the Zrt. the polaris then missed a turn and flew off into the "deep" powder of these feilds. so it was now us three crusing along battling for the front. This went on for a while then there was a turn up ahead into a little patch of trees. The turn was not a sharp turn and did not look threatning. Them two started to pull away and I lost them from my site around the corner so i sped up around the corner. Ok here is the good part. I come I around a corner to see my two buddies locked up accross the trail. Both of them are blocking a road that passes throgh a field. I saw them and i reacted quick. I turned sharp over to the left and just barley missed the rev. I hit the plowed snowbanking and cleared the whole two lane dirt road and then turned back onto the trail. Both the guys were pumoed that i missed them and saved all of us about 2000 dollars. We deffinatly took it easy for the rest of the day and this is a great stroy I will never forget.

I've had a few accedents but ya,

my friend greg and were both on my xcr and we took a pretty big jump behind a building doing about70mph and after we landed it was pretty icy and we were heading towards a building we tried to slow down but we started spinning we both flew off and landed by some farm equipment so we're sitting there and are like were the hell is the sled and then it landed on his head it took me a second to think about what had happened then i got it off of him.
another time my other freind justin is riding with me and my other buddy sean cuts us off while we are crossing the highway anyways u cant really see around the cornermy sled flipps on its side going across the highway just sparken lol well we got road burn and the sled was back up and running. lots of more stories but i dont think they all fit .

one day while i was driving a cement truck down fickleberry lane, paris hilton in a swim suit was on the side of the road so i stopped and picked her up. we got married and had twelve children. then i woke up but i realized i was driving when i fell alseep. i ended up hitting a car and pulled over. only my car was running. out of the wrecked car came britney spears and jessica simpson. they got in the back and started making out. i demanded they stop but they wouldnt so if you cant beat em join em. but as i was in the back making out with them i hit a skunk and popped a tire. jennifer and britney were killed instantly in the violnet tire blowout. i was stranded. then what do you know a green VW bus pulled up next to me. inside were twelve hot-n-horny cheerleaders and some hooters girls too. but unfotunately a peanut that was thrown out of a vehicle in front of us smashed through the window and killed the hooters girl driving. we skidded all over the road until we hit a moose(we were in canada) and we flipped over and everyone died. except for me. i was bummed but then i said screw it and i went snowmobiling. its true. just ask god he'll tell ya

Mountain Riding

After a few hours of cliff jumping and hill climbing we took off to a new area. We were the first to arive with about 30 new cem of snow. After a few hill climbs I came across a 40 foot drop, so off I go.

What I wasn't aware of is at 41 feet there was a creek with over 8 feet of snow on top of it. The sled nozed divied into to creek and I flew offhe sled, and tumbled at least 4 times.

The next thing I knew was I was buried in the snow in a ball like postion. I didn't know what way was up or down, so I layed there for a few seconds and thought if I spit and watch which way it landed in the helmet I could at least determine which way was up. After this I started to dig in a upward direction and after what seemed like forever I was able to poke my head out of the snow.

I looked over to my right and my sled was no where to be seen, by now my riding buddy's were down digging holes in the snow looking for me.
I called to them and we all had a great laugh, the sled was under the snow completely and it took about 3 hours to get it out.

Just keep the spit idea in the back of you mind if you ever find yourself under the snow, my story ended with me being around to sled another day.

Remember second place is just the first loser.

A dark empty sky loomed over head, no moon or stars to illuminate the night. I found myself staring into the dark void over-head without knowing I was doing it... so enticing, yet so eerie. It was like looking deep into the Devil's eyes.

The mare I was riding tripped up on a root sticking up srom the path, and it shook me from the dreamy state I had been in, breaking the spell cast upon me by the sky. And I realized, looking around, that I had taken the wrong path. Nothing around me looked familiar.

It was a small path that had not been traveled in years it seemed, and on the one side there was a huge shadowy forest. On the other a small church yard. Small gravestones leaning this way and that... weathered and chipped. And the church itself was tattered and boarded up.

Something didn't feel right, and my horse stopped in her tracks. She stomped her foreleg nervously and her eyes were fixed on the church. I kicked her sides gently, trying to urge her on. There was a pressence nearby and it didn't like us.

I could feel it's eyes watching us from inside that condemned church, and every breeze felt like it's cold breath on my flesh. These were times of reason, though... surely I was being childish. Surely my horse was sensing my own fear. I kicked her again, this time harder.

My horse reared up this time, and I lost my balance and fell. I was not being childish. No horse would act this way because of the rider. I sat up from the dusty path and could see the bay figure of my mare as she galloped into the unknown forest, away from me and that phantom beast.

I hurried to my feet and began to run from the church yard with all my might, but I had no idea where I was and no idea how far away my vineyard was. Faster and faster I ran, but that thing... I felt it creeping behind me, gaining behind me. I dared not look back to see what it was, or even if it was real.

And suddenly I felt myself being thrown to the ground. Or rather I was pushed from behind and stumbled. "Looking into the Devil's eyes, never knowing her form." I heard from above me, though my face was being pressed into the dirt. It was a womans voice... deep and seductive. She was pinning me down.

"I am the devil." She said. "See you in hell." A hand grabbed my hair and lifted my face from the dirt, and cold lips locked onto my throat. A sudden burst of pain as two fangs pierced through my veins and I realized that this beast was a vampire, syphoning my blood into her.

"Vampire." I said though my voice was hoarse and dry. I was dying already...

My head began ringing and my heart tried desperatly to make up for the blood loss, beating so hard I thought it might rip free from my chest. Pain was shooting through my body unlike any I'd ever known.

Thu-thump... thu-thump... my heart began to slow. My death was near and all pain seemed to dull. The beast released me from her grip and my face fell to the ground again. I was paralyzed and gasping for breaths.

As my heart grew weaker and my eyes began to roll back into my skull, I saw a vision in my mind. Two eyes leering at me from the dark... mocking me as I died. I heard her voice again. "Looking into the devil's eyes, never knowing her form."

this was one of my nightmares that ive had continuosly sence i was a kid and its a work in progress so well here it is...


One warm summer’s night, with the full moon hanging in the sky. A boy named Dylan, was taking a stroll down public road 61-B. when he heard the pounding of drums. So he immediately looked to his right then his left, and on his left he saw a gathering of Indians around a mysteriously large black boulder. As started to circle around it, they began to chant to the spirits within this boulder. When the moon had come out from behind a cloud, a bright green light shown from within the boulder as it started to hover in mid air. The sky was set ablaze, the ground as cold as ice. Then there was what looked like an enormous flash of light. It was if time had stopped for a life time, but about 2 minutes later Dylan had realized he was lying flat on his back in the middle of the street. So he got to his feet as quickly as possible to see what had happened. But what he saw was out of this world. In the place of the boulder was gigantic black wolf. With green glowing eyes that would pierce the soul, hair that was blacker than coal, great big white fangs dripping with saliva, paws the size of dinner plates, and a hunger for human flesh. At first Dylan just stood there in amazement of what was standing before him, a few seconds later he came to his senses and bolted towards home. Wondering what had just happened he stopped for a breather at the end of his driveway. As he turned around to think Dylan saw the wolf stalking behind him, in reaction to this, Dylan gasping for air ran the rest of the way home. On his way into the house he grabbed his dog Sadie by the collar and his cat Nala by the extra skin on the back of her neck, and took them inside with him. After he told his parents what had happened they just said it was a figment of his imagination.

This is about 5 years ago .... Dad,me,his buddy and son went sleddin out to clucuz lake. its probably around 9pm and we're headin out across the lake to get food. followin my dad we head down this hill. well my Dad goes first and i see his ski hit somethin, didnt really phase me ahaha... so im goin down... f*ckin plow right into whatever this f*ckin thing is, front flip over the handle bars...all of sudden kalan comes rippen down, plows into the back of me..slids right up into the bumper,he flips himself of... then danny comes along, he tried to brake, but it was too late... man was it the funniest sh*t seein him fly off, so we got this pile up of sleds....

finally get all them pulled out, mangled my right ski, kalan smashed his right side up from hittin me and danny only got a lil bent ski lucky f*cker....ahha in the morning we go to see what the hell it was...its like this 25foot long log just chillin, lucky we hit it first, someone could of had a expensive repair bill ahaha

This next one is pretty stupid, we're at bear lake crusin on this trail, it spits into 2 directions but comes around an meets again. So me and couple of other people stay to the left, and my dad and others go to the right cuz their buncha pussies ahaha..anways, we meet up at the point, an dtheres this little cliff part, doesnt look serious or anythin, f*ck it didnt even look step, so i taker first but just has ur goin over the edge, it drops...im not expectin this so i go, and danny is following me...my ass end wiped out sent me flyin,danny goes over the handle bars cuz of the drop, both of our sleds go rippin down this cliff face, across the next road onto the otehr side into a gulley. deep thick snow, past my waist. took a good couple of hours to get us out...


These are some memories Ill never forget of you Danny.
We will always hold those precious memories of when you were here and have that often silent tear. Rembering you is easy,we do it every day.. but the heartache will be somethin that never goes away. From then on I keep you my heart and thats were you shall remain, all I gotta do is look into the sky and know your smilin down. Rest In Peace - Ill be representin the 700 for you Dad.

One time I was with my uncle Ricky we were seeing who could jump farther my other uncle was wacthing so I pulled off a Superman twice
the second time i almost crashed but I still lost my uncle was smiling like a heyena.this was yesterday.

I was about 12 years old when I just go a new used sled for me. It was a 95 ski-doo formula sl 500 fan cooled. We had a hometown dealer fix and check over it well i waited for the big snow fall. When my dad got the call form the mechanic and said that the screws for the cluth were stripped my dad was cheap and had them poxy in new bolts. later that season well i was riding it around the secsion the damn clutch came loose and broke and shattered, scared the piss out of me. the clutch chipped the block and so we had to get a new engine but it cost about $2000- $4000 so that isn't happening b/c the sled only cost me $1200. This took place in febuary and I had no sled for the rest of the season and where i live here in centeral minnesota it never snows until January. this pissed me off, hey life is a bitch and never cheap out, especially on sleds but all in the end i got a new sled and it kicks ass.